Not while I think like this ( 02 May 2004 - 2:22 p.m. )

I sat in the garden in the sun, watching. It's odd, because the sun usually makes me feel better. A black cat came and sat with me for a while. It ran away very suddenly, as if something startled it. I don't know what.

This is all so fucking stupid, as if any of it will help. As if there is any point. As if I can stop suffocating, even just for a moment. It's too long, too much, and anyway there is nothing I like now, I can't form dreams of what I want to happen, because I know too well they won't come true. So I wish to leave now.

Byebye.

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