what is my problem? ( 15 April 2004 - 5:34 p.m. )

I'm such a horrible person. I'm always so very selfish. Every single thing I do is about me getting attention, me getting what I want. I'm constantly whining about how hard everything is, but it's only because I make it hard. I act mostly like a spoilt child when I can't have what I want. I take everything to hard and too personally, and so everyhting hurts me too much. But I don't have to. Really most of the pain I have is my own fault. I really must stop it.

I want to be nice and get on with people. And without trying to grab attention with stupid behaviour, supposedly the result of my mental problems. Really I want to behave normally, not drive people away with excessive neediness.

So I will stop.

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